Winning Attitude

"Attitudes are nothing more than habits of thoughts, and habits can be acquired. An action repeated becomes an attitude realized.”

~Paul Myer

"Winning Attitude" was a first kind of my soft skill training during my professional career and this training work as a soft tool to build a positive personality and it influenced me lot. After attending this training I am strongly convinced that life is only 10% of what happens to us, and 90% of how we react to it.
I would like to put some points/comments what I extracted from this training. I would request to just try out as there is nothing to lose in trying out this.

What is attitude? As the dictionary defines it, attitude is a way of talking and behaving. However, its significance in our lives is much more.
Attitude is a way of life. We have a choice everyday regarding the attitude we embrace for that day. The only difference between a good day and a bad day is your attitude. The attitude comes from the way of thinking i.e. thought of mind.
Each day goes according to our thoughts and life goes as you take it. In fact your mind is garden and you are a gardener and your thought is water, fertilizer to give good result and it depends what quality of fertilizer you use to make more productive your personality.
I would say, our life is a hard fact and it works your own way.

Why some people are very successful and some not, it's not that those successful person got better opportunity rather it is completely their winning attitude towards life.
Attitude reflects behavior. One's attitude towards the other, determines the other's attitude towards him. If one smiles at the other, the other may smile back, while if one act hard-nosed with the other, the other is likely to snap at him.
You perceive and experience your own version of everyday reality based on your innermost thoughts. All your day-to-day ations and behaviors are the reflections of your innermost thoughts.
First you have to believe in the self-empowerment to see the positive changes into your personality, you can transform any bad circumstances into good circumstances just by getting rid of your innermost limiting thoughts and replacing them with empowering thoughts. You just need to heal the bad thoughts. You can transform your bad feelings and bad emotions into good feelings and good emotions just by getting rid of your innermost limiting thoughts and replacing them with empowering thoughts.
If you constantly worry about the dead past events or about the unknown future events, you will miss the present event where your life is actually happening, so make habit to enjoy your present happening events to be happy for ever. You are beyond what you think you are; you are beyond what others think about you; actually you are, for what you are living on this planet for, main purpose of living your life is that which is giving.

Our thoughts also reflect the happiness and then how to choose happiness ....begin now to choose happiness when you open your eyes in the morning, say to yourself that “Today is going to be a great day for me”. I would say just try it out for a week and you can see a change in you.This way makes you energetic and radiant and will make you a joyous person.
Happiness is another name of habit. There is story about that "There was a farmer in the village and every morning when he awaken and every night before go to sleep he bless his family, the corps, the cattle, and thank God for the wonderful harvest". This farmer made a practice of this for over the years. As you know thoughts repeated regularly and systematically sink into the subconscious mind and become habitual. The farmer discovered this kind of thoughts and made his habit and happiness came automatically.
If you think ‘I can not ‘or ‘I can not afford’ it means already you clogged your mind with negative thoughts and it overrides you happiness. If you try to do something and get failed thought may come like I am not able or there is no way out or your become hopeless. Whereas other person can take it differently and think that if I failed this way now at least I got that this way thing can not be done. I hope everybody heard about the Thomas Edison, when he was experimenting to give the light to this world, he got failed thousand of times and later on the government said that you have wasted all the money while experimenting and there is no result at all. On this Mr. Edison said "Sir at least after me whoever will do experiment at least they got to know that these thousand ways are not the way to create the light bulb and person can start look for other way." This says how you think many people taken are differently but Edison is taken it positively and because of his winning attitude the whole world know him.

Our thougts get dull or gloomy with time of passage and people think I am not fitted for this as because now in old age and time has gone but it depends on the thoughts but not the age or time. It has well known about painter in a painting exhibition in Netherland and that person at the age of 60 presented painting and many people praised his paintings on this that old man said "Sir the best one has yet to come”. You can see how that person was cheerful, how much a zeal he had at this very old age. This zeal is nothing but he has filled with winning attitude.
Every person has this quality only difference is that how do you navigate your mind.
If you go to some place, some people enjoy and some not, it's not the likeness but It’s the thought of the person how a person accept, nothing is good or bad but it you only decided and your way of thinking.
You would know very well that, if a place you are living and someone has cheated you then you started thinking this place is full of cheater and no one is good and it creates a garbage at the top of your mind which always stops you accept the goodness ....Keep your mind open and avoid to collect bad thoughts otherwise there will not be space for good things.In fact, you are sum total of your thoughts.
Every thought is the action and every action builds your personality. Similarly your inner frustration is also a reflection of your limiting thoughts that have been unconsciously put into your limiting personality, while you were young and unaware about their inputs, therefore frustration not to be taken as an indication of your lack of ability, skills or deficiency in your winning personality. To motivate yourself, to keep your self-esteem always high you must look at your self-confidence as your own self-achieved inner strength .
Have ever observed that why a Child is happier than a Man/Woman because a child work while work, play while play, rest while rest. This is the only way how you can recreate and remain fresh like a child while living your life, begin with small steady steps instead of large quick ones, without going towards any extremes; properly balancing your rest, purpose, and relationships by adding variety to your style of living.
Another good point of my this session I liked that take the whole “responsibility” on yourself. Attitude is something you own and must take responsibility. Take the responsibility of your mistakes and self-improvement instead of falling into the habit of delaying the maximum input of your potential in the task on hand and also stop blaming circumstances for your mistakes. We are responsible for what we are and whatever wish ourselves to be, we have the power to make ourselves. We get only that for which we are fitted.
For instance, How you will behave If I put a little baby in your hands? Your whole life will change for a moment;whatever you maybe, you must become selfless for the time being. You will give up your criminal ideas as soon as responsibility is thrown upon you. In fact your whole character will change for awhile. So, if the whole responsibility is thrown upon our own shoulders, we shall be at our highest and best. Do not blame to anyone for your faults, stand upon your own feet, and take the whole responsibility upon yourselves. Do you take responsibility for your behavior and actions? Do people want to hang around you? Do you send people away with a smile on their face? Spend some time on this thinking about these questions and answer
them honestly.

If you need to change – then change – it’s up to you!

Another very good point from my training session I liked was, “Develop an attitude of gratitude”. Remember, we should always thanks and express gratitude of whatever happening around you.
Lets us say that when you go to restaurant and waiter ask you after dinner that “Sir/Maam How was food” and you say it was excellent, superb….. In other way when you go to home after working hours and let us say your Mom/wife ask you after dinner that how was food then you say it was okay, it could be made tastier...in dull way but why not to express your gratitude in cheerful manner and to say Yes, it was excellent. Just try it out and see the difference. This is called an attitude of gratitude.

I would like to conclude that just by integrating these simple soft tools which everybody has got only thing need to explore and it will naturally complement your life with satisfaction, fulfillment, happiness, joy and can open doors of eternal happiness within you because such mindset starts transforming your limiting personality into a winning personality.

"The 3 Mistake of my Life" by Chetan Bhagat

“There are two kind of writers -One; who want to make the unhappy people happy, Two; who want to make the happy people happier…I belong to latter genre”
--Chetan Bhagat



I don't frequently read the novels. In fact you can say I am not Novel freak but, I have read all the three books by Chetan Bhagat. I really like the way he writes. It’s so identifiable; it’s really lucid, simple and entertaining. I have high regards for Chetan Bhagat. Not because he writes great stuff, but because he writes for the masses.

His new novel- “The 3 mistakes of my life” is definitely not a trash as per my perceptions . It’s not a great book. Forget it; it’s not close to “Five Point Someone” but, it’s still a nice time pass read. The kind of books that you like to finish in one goes that’s what I did. It's just like bollywood movies. His third novel has clear glimpses of a bollywood drama. It has all the emotions, twists and turns.

Reading “The 3 mistakes of my life” has left me with mixed feelings. The story starts in a really unusual manner. The author paints himself into the picture by becoming a character in the story. He receives an e-mail from a fan stating rather baldly that he is committing suicide even as he types the mail. The author is shocked and goes into overdrive. Sitting in Singapore, he traces the mail to Ahmedabad and even finds the name of the sender. Our credulity is stretched as he jets off to India in search of the suicidal fan. This sets the stage for more incredible coincidences and logical jumps throughout the book.

It’s about a businessman and his friends, set in the backdrop of Gujarat during the times of earthquake and Godhra.The elements of Cricket, religion and business provide all the necessary drama.

The plot and story are just about okay. But at the end of it, you expect a little more and I felt the title was not appropriate. In my opinions “The 3 mistakes of my life” is no mistake by any chance and in fact I think first things first so it should NOT be mistake. Till the end of story there was curiosity that what are those three mistakes did by the business man Govind.The "Mistakes" that Govind commits, are not really "Mistakes". It can happen to anyone.

Chetan Bhagat says that "If by reading this, a Hindu neighbor thinks about the Muslim in a different way, I will be more than happy".
Yep, it's very true that in this novel it has described that how Ishan, Govind and Omi were ardently devoted to Ali to create him as a good cricketer and also fought back with people who wanted to kill a muslim chap Ali.

I would say, make no mistake, it’s a one time read, okay shokay but, definitely not as good as his earlier novels. Now it’s time for some “Not so good points”. The story which is developed so beautifully in the first half of the book slag a bit in the latter half. I felt that the end could have been scripted better. Also the book could have been titled something else because three mistakes were NOT really "Mistake".

I am not going to write the three mistakes as addressed in the novel as it will fall back the charm/interest to read novel nevertheless, I reiterate three mistakes were not really "Mistake".
Now the main question should you buy a copy for yourself?
I would say if you are a person of “never say die attitude”, have it in you to take everything in good stride, someone who can resurrect from ashes, someone who has dreams and has the will to realize them, then the book is definitely for you.

By the way I got it from my Library where people were claimed one after other to read this book which never ever happened for any other books in my office library. This sounds even book is not so great but it shows people like this novel and really I will be novel freak if Chetan Bhagat will keep writing novel :-).............!!!

So, don’t waste time, grab a copy and enjoy your weekend with it. I am sure you will relish the investment.

Project Star Award for Quarter 1 -2008.

"Develop an attitude of gratitude, and give thanks for everything that happens to you, knowing that every step forward is a step toward achieving something bigger and better than your current situation".

--Brian Tracy

The day 08 May 2008 Thursday was something special for me.
I was at work in my office locked in cubical with my Computer as always. While, working just one of my colleagues ping me on my office communicator saying that 'CONGRATULATION!!!' ...

I asked for what.....He replied, you got a Project Star Award for Quarter 1 -2008.
I knew that just one announcement mail was pumped in my mailbox a minute before but, I thought will have look on that but surprisingly before that I got the news that my name is also there with Emp code-006411 Pramod Kumar Upadhyay- Project Star Award Winner.
Yes, really this news delighted me as throughout my career, I have got appreciable words or mails for my splendid work, promptness, disciplined, devotion but it was somewhat
more heart touching happiness and I bubbled with pleasure as this kind of award first time in my professional career.
Getting Project Star Award is one of my achievements and I would like comments on this achievement and put my thoughts towards work at workplace.
I believe that this kind of appreciation put more motivation in employee. In fact award/appreciation plays a vital role to push someone ahead in career path.
Award/appreciation is like fuel to do good work. If you have something good in any field and if you praised for that certainly it realizes that there are more expectations towards me and it fuels you my all responsibilities whichever in role I am performing.
My idea at work is always that if at workplace someone is not good at work we should never shout or blame the person instead of that give them a chance as none in this world is born intelligent. People always learn from surroundings and that way we can put our effort to groom those people to make enough capable.
I have always mind my own business at work means, do what I supposed to do.
Apart from just doing a work at workplace, being nice to colleagues and maintaining a friendly and empowered environment is also a part of our daily work. I never get worried about what others are doing or not doing; I always keep my work on the top and deliver excellence. So at work, we should always maintain harmony, maintain fun and maintain a friendly environment and then a person can be it first, and will influence others. People who part take in politics don't last. Being as political at workplace can give momentarily appreciation but in long run they will self destruct. Instead of be political, be a good performer whatever potential you have to become the pivot of your workplace.
I think, a lot of people want many things in life. Their focus becomes the achievement and they feel that it must be served to them just because they want it but it's not like that to achieve desire we need to perform well and maintain our form. We get noticed for our performance not our potential and by that way we can put our potential into performance and we can earn our space.
Pareto's Principle, the 80/20 Rule says that we should serve as a daily reminder to focus 80 percent of your time and energy on the 20 percent of you work that is really important. Don't just "work smart", work smart on the right things. I truly believe in this fact that time management is key point to reach to goal and success path that’s why I always love to be on time at my workplace and by that way I maintain a disciplined at my workplace.
There is one fundamental aspect that to get the thing done perfectly and that is we should follow each steps perfectly as each of steps is very important to get the positive result .
I remember once my dear brother set an example on this and it's really true fact.
For instance in college time you write the entrance test to get into admission in a college but you know the filling entrance form and getting the form first is as much important as to writing and study hard to crack the entrance test. Supposedly, if we do mistake while filling form or not getting form on time certainly, we can fail to write the entrance test and result would not be positive.
I truly believe in this fact that we should give importance to each step to reach to the goal.
I have seen many people are not energetic at workplace but, if we go at work, we should go with enthusiasm and excitement whether the work which you have it good or bad.
We should make enthusiasm and excitement in a daily practice. If we will have excitement at work what we do then we start loving our work and definitely if we love with something we do best for that.
I would say doesn’t work hard but start love your work then automatically we crate interest what the work we do and then we can deliver the best result at work.

In the last, I would like to conclude on this achievement.......
I absolutely believe if you achieve something in life it's not the only you in fact, there is very well dictum that 'There is no such thing as a self made person. We are made up of thousands of others.' Everyone who has ever done a kind deed for us, or spoken one word of encouragement to us, has entered into the make-up of our character and of our thoughts, as well as our success. A lot of people have contributed to where I am today.
All the geniuses whose favor towards me or their work which I have read through books and articles, my colleagues whose dedication has helped me climb to where I am, my family whose encouragement and belief which has brought me so far, and all the endless stream of people who through their appreciation emails, letters, phone calls have expressed their gratitude and respect, have contributed where I am and whatever achieved till date.

I am very much thankful to the people who bring to notice that I deserve for this Project Star Award.

Posting this blog will remind me and accelerate my thoughts that I have to always thrive for excellence in each phase of my career path!!!

The Fear of Death-Dreaming A Death

"A man should not leave this earth with unfinished business.
He should live each day as if it was a pre-flight check.
He should ask each morning, am I prepared to lift-off? "
--Diane Frolov and Andrew Schneider


I am in Heaven and sitting on God' lap.I cries and my heart has been broken.
I am saying something to my Mommy and Papa.I was so scared, I began screaming, but you were unable to help me as It wasn't in your hand and Monster was pulling me and was saying lets go to the god now, your time is over and instead of your Mommy lap, you would in the God's lap. I was saying , I have always wanted to be your good boy.I don't quite understand what has happened. I requested to Monster saying that, I am started just realizing my existence. I was in a dark, yet comfortable place. I saw, I had fingers and toes and keep walking towards Monster , It looks he is pulling me and I was pretty far from my home but, was not ready to leave my surroundings. I spent most of my time thinking,sleeping or working .
Sometimes I was crying with you. I was sad, and hoped I would be better soon. I wondered why I cried so much. I was thinking I hurt someone and now, I have to go to God' lap and the Mommy and Papa cried almost all of the day as I was leaving them forever.
The monster got closer and closer as I was screaming and screaming, "Mommy, Mommy, help me please; Mommy, help me."

Complete terror is all I felt. I screamed and screamed until I thought I couldn't anymore.Then the monster started ripping my arm off. It hurt so bad; the pain I can never explain. It didn't stop. Oh, how I begged it to stop. I screamed in horror as it ripped my leg off.
Though I was in such complete pain, I was dying. I knew I would never see your face or hear you say how much you love me.

I said,I wanted to make all your tears go away. I had so many plans to make you happy. Now I couldn't; all my dreams were shattered. Though I was in utter pain and horror, I felt the pain of my heart breaking, above all.

I wanted more than anything to be your son.No use now, for I was dying a painful death.
I wanted to tell you that I love you before I was gone and soon, I no longer had the breath to say them; I was dead. I felt myself rising. I was being carried by a huge angel/Monster into a big beautiful place. I was still crying, but the physical pain was gone. The Monster took me to God and set me on own lap. He said, He loved me and then I was saying to god that I wanted to live. I had the will, but I couldn't; the monster was too powerful. It sucked my arm and legs off and finally got all of me. It was impossible to live. I was saying to God that....I just wanted you to know why ....I didn't want to die.
...................then tring tring tring......ringing something..................................
...................................

Suddenly,there is as sound of tring tring......tring.... riniging a bell and there was milkman at the door of house and my eye opened...Ahh, thank god.....I am not in God's lap but, I was on my bed and was sleeping and I was DREAMING A DEATH .For a moment, I couldn't believe that it's true that I am alive but yes,yes ...I am alive and give me a feeling like I have just returned from mouth of death .This dream really was painiful,dreadful and frightning and in dream I yelled,cried and disconteneted.
This dream was a lesson for me that all of our possessions, relationships, even our talents and skills are all temporary. So how can our body be anything more? Philosper says being afraid of death is like being afraid to give up an old and worn-out garment and our body is also like that BUT, all in all in the dream, I have seen very closely to leave behind our beloved and and really it was the FEAR OF DEATH.

Voyage en France- Travel to France

In the past I used to post blog frequently but it has been long time to post a blog.
The day when I wrote the last blog and this blog lot ups and down.....
Last blog posted for long time ago don't remember when.....
However, it's taken me a lot longer to organize my time but as I normally skip the gossip stuff, but I couldn't resist this and I would love to put some comments for my first visit to France :-).

Sometimes I feel most of time I get things not easily (I hope most person thinks in that way not sure... ;-) even I work hard and try to give more than 100% of my effort.
The problem came in visa issuance...sometime it recall how the hectic was those days
Ultimately, I got it and was ready to fly on 10th of September'07.
Before starting to IGAI New Delhi airport to catch the flight for Frankfurt...I started getting calls from home, friends...The most emotional part was that the call from my mom she was too scared and nervous like I am leaving her forever and will never come back....but she was aware that I will be back to India very soon in a month, While talking over phone I also filled with emotions and it happens as we love to our beloved.... :-)

There was long queue to get the boarding pass for Lufthansa flight.
I boarded to the flight and reached to Frankfurt,Germany in the morning in early hours. It might be, it won't be amazing to be there for others but as it was my first visit and I feel...It was mind blowing...Frankfurt Airport was huge and too crowded and looks all over the world
flight passes through Frankfurt.

As, I reached to Frankfurt my journey started to Strasburg which was my final destination.
I boarded to Lufthansa bus and it took 2 hrs. 30 mins to reach to Strasbourg,France.
I was alone while traveling so far whenever you are alone lot things sprint to mind and same was happening with me...was thinking World is too big but now days to be in any part of world do not take long as few hours before I was at IGAI, New Delhi and now I am on the way to Satrsburg.

I was approaching to Strasbourg and was watching the secene..lot shining BMW, Audi ,Chevrolet Volt, Volkswagen cars were running on the road ...the road were clean, spotless.

I reached to Strasbourg around 11:00AM and take the cab to reach to the Citadine Hotel which was in the center of the city. Strasbourg is located in France and situated on the banks of the river Rhine. Strasbourg is known for its historical and curltural sights, as well as its specific, picturesque ambiance. Strasbourg is also known for its enchanting forests, and above all white wine.
During my stay to Strasbourg, I used to go to Alcatel Office and come back by Tram.
Tram is the most popular, most effective and by all means the most comfortable way of transport in Strasbourg. Four tram lines (A, B C and D) connect all corners of the city and make city traffic more fluid. During those days another Line E were introduced and hey....government made it free to travel and roam anywhere in the Strasbourg for three days.

Now the days started passing and it was not more than week but I started thinking and how soon I will reach to India.
Strasbourg is also known for the best French cuisine. However, being Vegetarian... I face food problem and not tried French cuisine as was scared that if something have Non-veg...he he he he he ... :-). I am sorry Nonvegitarians...but it is not possible for me to have Non-Veg food.

First Day, I had lunch at Alcatel office ...but I was very much scared that If could eat
Non-veg.From next day I cooked and took my lunch to office and days passed and daily had to manage to have lunch cooked by me and I know , I am not a good cook....by colleague liked the way I cooked...Might be they wre also not getting good foods so..food coked by me they liked..he he he ...isn't it true..what do you say..... :),

but have to be happy with my lunch. I would say Thanks to LAYS Chips which we used to have during lunch to add the taste.

Week passed and we planned to visit Paris and I was very much keen to see the Eiffel Tower which I had seen many times in mazines, books, television...Etc..
We four guys planned for the trip and started early in the morning by TGV train from Strasbourg to Paris.TGV train is Europe's newest high-speed train and seat reservations are required on TGV trains.

We arrived to Paris in 3 hours. We went to Hotel for stay and booked and dump our lagauges over there get ready to roam in Paris. I noticed, when I stepped out of Hotel that the ladies there dress very nice and very classic. The only jogging pants I saw were on the fat tourists! It doesn’t matter what they did, just walking around being pretty or grocery shopping.

Everyone knows that Paris is one of the most popular tourist destinations in the world.
We sighted Eiffel tower, Louvre Museum and did boating in Paris visit. I found that how all the locations are well connected by Metro which runs on every 4-5 mins .

You never have to wait longer than 5 minutes for the next train and the metro stations don’t smell bad he he he he..... :-). You need not to ask anyone about locations as everything was easily traceable by map to reach to other locations.

Do not miss your map while travlling as you might ask and may you get the answer but it's bit difficult to make out their pronunciation...(I don't want to teach you French as I tried but ahh...still don't know... )

We first headed to Louvre Museum. Museum is built on the city's western edge; the original structure was gradually engulfed as the city grew as I heard about..... :-).

LovrveMuseum, where you can find original painting of MonaLisa.
It might be many people want to touch this but I don't want to touch it, because I don't want to mess it up which is preserevd for a long long time.People were crazy there to have snaps with this painting. LovrveMuseum, even if you chose never to set foot inside the museum, its walls alone are a living - and still evolving French history lesson.
Cautions....DO NOT TRY TO SEE IT ALL. This is impossible... he he he he... :-) Because, you will never see it all in one day. Better spend enough time with one painting and it will be yours forever.So, please, do this for me if you go to the Louvre. Find one painting, one sculpture, one art object - and make it yours. Like, I spent most time with MonaLisa painting.
After visiting to Louvre Musem we headed over to Eiffel Tower.
When we were on our way to the Eiffel Tower, we strolled on the Lafayette a gignatic,really nice and huge Shopping Mall. I was actually quite shocked when I saw a fantastic watch that was just 35,000 euros ummmmm.... I had to gasp for air. The contrast was so big; a person who beg for money and some French fries and another person who buys a terrific watches with the amount of money that poor person could live till the end of his/her life. Ah, the way the world works is crazy isn’t it?

Now we reached at the bottom of the Eiffel towers and there was along queue to take the tickets. We got the tickets and went on the TOP of Eiffel tower.
In the night when Eiffel Tower started glittering it was awesome and mind blowing and people were so much excited and started shouting. We had great moment to have Beer at the Eiffel Tower. A very good experience. If you drink you can also try as we took advantage of our time that we were at the tope of Eiffel Tower because it is something that we can't do all the time because it's far from us....he he he he he he :-)
By the time when came down we were damn hungry but the food available around the Tower was not okay for me...I hate fast foods........ :-(
Somehow we got Samosha and Garama Garam Chaye (Tea)...After getting the taste of India in Paris ...it was excellent. I did not see anything really extreme fashion-wise, maybe because I had such a short stay over there.
By the time we got tired and keep roaming and then we back to hotel and took a sleep and got early in the morning and started for the Disneyland.
Disneyland Paris is situated about 40km from Paris this is a major tourist's attraction especially for children. Metro takes 45 mins from Paris to reach DisneyLand.
If you want to discover the magic of a Disneyland do visit to this place.

Paris, there are lots of things to see there but we don't have enough time as one of our Boss said that going 2 days even 2 weeks are not enough to see the Paris/Disney Land and yes that's very true.

Overall, there was so much architectural beauty cramped in two days that my brain almost exploded and the people in Paris dress very nice, classic and chic. Both women and men too, they pay close attention to details. The French love and respect their designers and they are well dressed and care what they put on their bodies.

I would say while visiting to any part of the France and If you have not visited to Paris then you have missed one of the most wonderful 'EIFFEL TOWER'. You must fully experience it at least once in a lifetime.

Thats' ll my first Visit to France for very short period of time.

I hope to see me there again....... :-)

VAISHNAV DEVI-Come, Now is the Time to Worship

"Whatever you can believe,
You can achieve."

Well, life was getting so bored that even the weekends seemed to be dull.
Then, I realized that it’s definitely not worth , so I took so called break from work
for about one week to have togetherness with family members.

Well, I heard lot and sometime have seen in the movie about
"Chalo Bulawa Aya Hai Mata Ne Bulaya Hai" for Vaishnav Devi.

This time we planned to go for Vaishanv Devi.

Well, my journey started like that I had flight on 13th from Kolkata to Delhi and on the other side office work also had to manage as it was bit stretched.
I left office late to catch the flight .When, I reached to Kolkata Airport I have seen Bollywood star Rani Mukharjee but, as I was late so I rushed to the Air Sahara counter to get the boarding pass ultimately got to know that flight is delayed 40 Mins.
As, Flight got delayed so, I reached to New Delhi late night and on the very next early morning I had to start for Jammu along with family. We had train from Delhi to Jammu in the morning.
It was nice journey from Delhi to Jammu .We reached to Jammu in the evening on 14th April 2007.I heard name of Jammu lot of times but have seen also.

We booked an AC cab to start from Jammu station to Katra....huh… it was AC cab but it didn’t seem like that.Now , we were on the way to Katra which is around 50 Km. from the Jammu.
On the way there were security forces as the area is sensitive for terrorist attack about which I have heard or seen in the television ,really I saw some security forces in attention .
Really, they are great and I salute to our Army forces.
Katra is a small town and is located in a high altitude and in the hilly region.
The half of the route from Jammu to Katra was pathetic and quite dangerous turnings because of Hill area. As, we reached to Katra everybody got exhausted and everone face were saying that take a break man and have sound sleep will start in the morning.............
but we decided it's better to start for uphill ascent in the night not in the morning.
So, finally after getting fresh and having dinner we set off to Vaishnav Devi around 12:30 night and we said ‘Jor se Bolo Jai Mata Di’.

Well, We had to climb up 13 Km for Vaishnav Devi Darshan and really it was not easy task....first 3 Km with full enthusiasm and then we started think hmmm… how come we will walk more 9 KM.Really, I had never ever thought that I can walk 13 Km.

While mountaineering, I also captured the moment of bliss in my camera.We were climbing up, taking rest keep walking.....If we take rest after sometime and some person crosses I thinks if that guy can walk then why not I so..again start and like that we reached to destination in the morning 6 O’clock. If, I think now I don't believe how I walked so long…Anyway, Dad & Mom also walked so long ...really that's quite amazing and really tough job but nothing is impossible in this world this proves that.

Lot of devotee were walking and keep walking and on the way guys were keep saying
‘Jor Se Bolo Jai Mata Di....’on reaching out there, the experience was totally a different. Morning time chanting view of the valleys, filled with green trees, chirping sounds of the birds, echoes of the Jai Mata Di all along the path, really it was awesome!

Finally, for Darshan of Vaishnav Devi inside the cave we hardly have to stay for awhile may be for seconds...and it's not for me only...it was for every devotee (excluding VIPs, Celebraties, and our Leaders).
Now after Darshan...again have to come down huh again 13 km have to walk but this time even there was the bright afternoon we came downhill very fast I think in 5Hrs ...only....wow great.

We got bushed that as we came to hotel everyone of us preferred to have bed instead of have dining table......he he he he… :-) .
Next day we started for Jammu from where we had to catch the train and that way Vaishnav Devi Darshan end up.

Anyway whether it be visiting to religious place or
any adventurous place I like travelling interminably and for me It was a great time as I had been with family during this trip. The best part was that being togetherness which we get hardly in today’s life.

All in all I would say that it is worth seeing and admiring far away from the madding crowd, unending sounds of the modern machines and vehicles.

My Mom believe lot in the God and that's why at this old age also she climbed 13 Km up for darshan and came down as same speed as we guys walked which conclude that

"Whatever you can believe, you can achieve."

Weekend

"Weekends are a bit like rainbows;

they look good from a distance

but disappear when you get up close to them.”

As the Firday knocks in the week and you will say now weekend...After working hard five days or working hardly on these five days...he he he Weekend ....TWO days to have complete relax.Friday is the day when people gets in mood of weekend after lunch break...and say..oh..Thank god.... Week End is about to start.

Those who have lot of work....have to decide whether weekend is going to spoil or what to do to escape from work on weekend.

I believe that WORK HARD and put 100% on these five days and have complete relax two days what do you say guys isn't it great idea .

So, it's better to work five days sticking as a worm with your computer and not to take many Tea or Coffee breaks and waistng in gossiping with colleagues at work otherwise you will end up working on weekends and you would be blaiming to boss that why did he give me lot of work and have pull on weekends.

Lets talk about positive side of weekends .Weekend for different people mean different things.Some of the guys want to watching movie and rocking and rolling in the bar .

Some of guys sleeping and it seems balancing those last 5 days when they've not slept properly as Boss was coming to dream and was keep knocking to complete your task...........he he he he :-)

Some of guys who has girl friend start SMS from morning saying 'Hey GM n watzs plan for 2day'and keep SMSing till the end of day until unless they don't see another.

Some guys say 'Hey lets go to Shopping malls even don't have to shop anything but hey come on will go and do time pass over there'.

Some of guys like me ...be at home and take sound sleep and browse and like that days end up.

I am sick or you can say crazy about this ......keep on surfing whole day....guys say...what do you do how long you will be on the net...but I do and do..as like that and feel better than to go shopping malls even don't have to shop anything..as I freak out looking crowds.I feel better peacefulness when not many people around which gives me more pleasure,more relax and peace of mind.Definilty, I like to gossip with friends,debating on certian matters but not like looking at crowds.So... for me Week end is log to Internet and keep browsing.
Internet gives me lot of things and for me It's better way to grab the knowledage as well as to entertain and many online services.I do..lot of things netbanking,ticket booking,to get information about places,obviosuly for Job searching and obviously reading and writing Blogs.

I don't remember that when last time I went to Railway reservation counter to book the ticket.

So isn't it gives comfort of the life to grab lot of information from A to Z .Now, it would be quite difficult to live without Internet. It seems,I am addicted of Internet but while at work I hardly log to Ineternet as I do believe to work at work...no other things...as like to give 100% whatever I do.
Being a software professional we hardly write unless have to send mails and

of course....some time on weekends writing such blogs will bit improve my writing skill....so what do you say how is my written skills....isn't it improving..he he he he he ....!!!

At last I would say everybody has DIFFERENT way and it's good that what you are doing you should ENJOY that at the fullest.

It’s Saturday.It’s Saturday
It’s our day.When we will chat
We’ll have a fight.Exchange a smile In our STYLE.

Now in that way Weekend gets ended and hmmmm...again back to work.

Remembering Firends

New is good, but old is the best;
Make new friends, but keep the old;
One is sliver and the other gold .

Over last few days..I roamed lot and came accross of lot of college friends and the guys to whom I met or saw in childhood...Now again back to Kolkata leaving all those friends... We spent days with cracking jokes,which are sticked to my mind...gossiping in the room or canteen....commenting on one another keep laughing...We have traded secrets and laughs as well sorrows and pain.We are now far away..... but, still there is bond among us....this bond has taken years to build and as the time passes....getting strong and stronger.
Those days memories are everlasting .I know those gloden days would never come back but,
I still love you guys and all of your smiling faces.
I don't understand what to write more but there are few lines which was mailed by one of friend of mine and would like to put is in the blog from my office mailbox as these lines touched me very closely....

Remembering my friends,after few years,
My eyes were filled with tears,
Everyone is now busy a lot,
No one escaped destiny's plot.

Saw the girl,whom once i thought as my best friend,
Oops!Today she is somebody else's girl fiend,
After months,remembered about her for a little while,
Heard she is happy,that made me smile.
Project reviews to campus interviews,
Nicknames to last bench games,
Cultural rehearsals to love proposals,
Short term crushes to classroom blushes.

Everything is fresh in our mind,
Wish life could just rewind,
Let's laugh,play and rejoice,
Once again become college guys.

Chatting and laughing,we all were in elation,
Till the painful moment of seperation,
When it was time to part,
We returned with a heavy heart.

Today life is full of commitments,
And to many worries,
But those cherished moments,
Will live forever in our memories.

At last,I would say something.. it might be you agree or disagree ....but I feel...
"Friends at college who may be big or small but,friends at the college are best of all"

Today(2006)->Tomorrow(2007)

"To live well, is to be happy every DAY.
It can be done!
Just find one good thing about each DAY that passes...."

This time New year was at Home Varansai.
When,whole world was celebarting to welcome new year in their style dancing,drinking,rocking,singing,cutting cake.....etc.
Well,I was also celebrating but, I wanted to do it differently that's why I was celebrating while sleeping and dreaming for better tomorrow.Hey... what do you say.. is not this a unique way.
I was dreaming to dream up a better tomorrow.First morning of 2007 was same as the 31st Dec 2006 only thing was that got lot of wishes 'HAPPY NEW YEAR 2007 over the phone thorough SMS...as next morning I switched on my mobile hmmm... lot of SMS one by one as last night on 31st Dec 2006 ....I switched off the mobile to have nice sleep and to have sweet dream for the coming new DAY(Year 2007).
1st January marks the end of a period of remembrance of the passing year, especially on radio, television, and in newspapers. It is also a memorable occasion to make New Year's resolutions, which they hope to fulfill in the coming Year. Most of us has general perception that the New Year is an event that happens when a culture celebrates the end of one year and the beginning of the next year and also New Year redresolutions is simply another way to wish away the past in exchange for hopes of the future, but I dont't think so.... for me now days are passing.....and
I would express my thougths in certain way.... A person
who is unhealthy today... want to be more physically fit tomorrow
who is in sorrow today... want to be happier tomorrow
who is poor today... want to be rich tomorrow
who is rich today... want to be richer tomorrow
who is heavier today... want to lose weight tomorrow
who is loser today... want to be winner tommorw

Everybody wants better for tomorrow.All days are created equal whether it would be 31st Dec of 2006 or 1st Jan of 2007. If, we always day to day to handle our problems which come on the way of life rather than running away from that ...we can make better tomorrow.
My perception is .....What will I do and I will achive this year which totally depends on day to day activity.
So, I strongly beleive that Change of YEAR not matters for me the DAY matters which always counts in our life.

15 December@Kolkata

'Man's main task in life is to give birth to himself, to become what he potentially is.The most important product of his effort is his own personality'.
~ Erich Fromm

15 December was somehting...special....

Those who don't know about this date let me say that it was B'day bash date so what you are thinking...so..which gift you are going to give to me....he he he.......as someone has said 'Birthday is a chance for you to give presents to someone and make him or her feel good'.
On this day, I got up as usual...7 o'clock morning...I got a first call and 'you and I in this beautiful world green grass to sky' hey..... this is mobile ringtone and called by one of the dearest Senior from Banglore.

In this world everybody is so much busy that they don't get even time to make call but on 15th Dec at Capgemini office while working I was keep getting..Calls.....trin trin.....really..whole day I wasn't able to concentrate at my work..one hand holding mouse..for computer and other hand holding mobile and keep talking and talking as many wishes from friends.I could not stop others making calls as my friends were delighted to wish me HAPPY B'DAY.
Really..friends who are seven sea away from me also remebered my B'day and wished me
on phone.
Getting wishes on phone is definitly gives more pleasure than that of just sending mail for wishes.Oops..I am getting emotional....really missing all of you.....my sweet and caring friends
Hmmm...I am special to all of friend of mine...is not true hey what do you say...he he he .. :)

I had a great time at office with my team members though I don't like cutting cake even it's give me immense pleasure as thier hospitality was splendid to celebrate my B'day.
We always say, we should not look behind but in terms of age we always want to look behind..mean to say older one always want to be younger and it would be best if we go back to our lovely days 'childhood' ....So guys...it 's better to have start celebration with distributing chocolates to my teammates.
Birthday cakes. Lighted candles. Singing “Happy Birthday.” Receiving gifts.In almost every culture and nation on earth, virtually nothing is as universally celebrated as birthdays.
Saying “happy birthday” to friends and loved ones was society’s superstitious way of protecting them from evil spirits. Birthday thumps, bumps, pinches, etc., were said to bring luck and send away evil spirits. Party snappers, horns and other noisemakers were also intended to scare off bad-luck spirits.

SAP world

I am LIVING in SAP world those who don't know about SAP definitly would think what is SAP .Before answering to your question I would say read this blog and at last you will get the answer .
It's sucked me as mind was just revolving around the ABAP even I was not at work .
Those who don't know what's it I would say 'A Boring Programming Language'
he he he ......am I right?
Guys whether you believe or not ABAP....only ABAP and while logging to HDFC Internet Banking for money tranfer I enetred my SAP logon id and passwd and not only 2 times and third time HDFC Login id which was right but huh ...again entered password which I use to enter SAP world.
I am very much worried as same kind of incident happen earlier which was like I entered my SAP Logon passwd to Office machine and also to my Yahoo Messenger.
If, my mind will revlove so much around SAP there is no doubt that some day I would accidentally enter password on the microwave he he he ......am I right guys?
So what do you say ,is it not creating a problem....and you would say SAP stands for
'Supply A Problem' rather saying this I would have to maintain equilibrum of official and personal work and then definitly you would agree that
SAP is SYSTEMS,APPLICATIONS and PRODUCT for data processing
not a source which 'Supply A Problem' <> SAP.

Dhoom-> Dhoom2 -> ??

Dhoom(2004) watched in City of Pearls and Dhoom2(2006) watched in City of Joy---->??

Well..After 3 months I WATCHED movie in theatre....it was Dhoom2..night show..The movie is one of those movies where you just cherish the movie the first time and forget about it. It was a kind of time pass movie..huh time pass in night show...when I should have nice..sleep...and paid 190 bucks..for time pass...which was not worth..Movie was mixture of Stunt(Incredible) + Love(??) + Comedy(Headache)...The stunts and action scenes were awesome...Hirithik acted and also rocked well and I think without whom this movie would have been a soulless body.
I realize that the movie is not just about brawns, but brains too but end up Love story...which was't sound.
Rimi Sen had a brief and forgettable role and somewhere she lost in the movie ,means didn't appear..at all . It seems... director forgot Rimi Sen is also in the movie.......he he he he.
Ash came up with some stunt and end up with Love.....Ash role turned to ash
Bipasha came up as Cop and at the end Sonali(Bipasha) turned to Monali(Bipasha) who was coping as bikni show...along with Ali... he he he...!!!!
First half there were sereis of intelligent robberies and stunt in stunning way whereas last robbery in Brazil turned out to be lack of brilliance and without any thrill however, tried to make lovespot over there. It seems director thinks...there is no exposure so to tried tooks us to Brazil and watch...some bikni shows with Bikers....instead of showing stunt.
Cool...anyway I visited Brazil..an amazing..Beach..he he he he ....let see when I would be there ..
Watching tailor on television seems, this Dhoom turns out to be bigger and bombastic . It is essentially cops and robbers story with some glamour and humour thrown in. In this tussle between cops and thieves, it is Love that wins in the end.
So in dilemma..whether end up with Stunt or Love ..movie wind up with Love story.After all, Aashiqon ka jamaana hai, zara Dhoom se niklega.
However, I comment that the first time I thought it was good, but the second time, I felt it could have been better and end up with only time pass. Yes....if you have to pass time in 190 bucks..go for the movie.

Cook-Book

Someone has said
"To the old saying that man built the house but woman made of it a home might be added the modern supplement that woman accepted cooking as a chore but man has made of it a recreation."

Oh yes...I can...
Last week maid servent was on leave. So..I made up my mindset that have to have cook ..no way as the place where I stay ..have less option for veggy food and all in all I don't like eating daily outside.
So,I cooked myself. and good thing is that I tried to cook Roti ( Bread or Chapati) which is too difficult for me..Curry I cooked easily..that's not a big deal for me. Almost 7 days..I cooked myself and always Roti even cooking rice is pretty easier than that of Roti. After coming from office huh ....I have to cook but as done with cooking Yes..I can cook and why to go outside to eat as simple and plain food and certainly hygienic food would be the best if it would be cooked at home.
It took hardly 45 Mins ( Cooking & Cleaning ) . So, It's matter of prepare mindset like why I can not do. One cannot think well, love well, sleep well, if one has not dined well.So guys...It's difficult to think cooking but pleasant thoughts while eating food cooked at home..Am I right?
But Guys..don't expect I will cook for you if you visit at my home..as I can cook but not as mouth-watering that you can lick your own fingers ......heheheh... :)

I decided to start writing this blog because...

Well, I created blog when was in Hyderabad and thought will keep writing but how come .....
I didn't have enough time however if I got any time which passed in gossiping as lot of friends were around . Those days time flew away as the pendulum swings.
But now in Kolkata time goes slow as noone around .
Now, I do manage to write here regularly, might be getting enough time nothing to do special on week ends so..better to write something..hope, it might be a nice way of keeping friends and family updated on what's going on in my life.Not that there's usually a whole lot going on in my life,but you know... theoretically, if anything did happen,I could write of it here. Exciting, right? I know.So just carry on reading people!This blog was born not long ago.So please do not expect much.More has yet to come...

Delighted to Light Up

It had been long time to celebarte Diwali at Home.Last 6 years Diwlai festival ,I celebarted in Hyderabad.Out of 6 years, 3 years Diwali celebration in the HCU campus and that was also very good moment where we used to do collection from all MCA students and then bought some candles,firecrakers and definitly some sweet and we used to decorate open dias and celebrate there with all HCU friends really unforgotable moment and then we also used to dance as we guys were fan and dancing hard always.Out of campus also we had great Diwali we used to decorate our rented house where I stayed with our HCU gang and then we used to go to campus to celeberate diwali with our lovely juniors.Last year diwali 2005 was quite boring for me as most of friend were not with me either they went to home or out of Hyderabad.
21st Oct 2006 Diwali delighted me and why not as celebarted at home I went to home on 20th Oct but sad part was that I were only with parents now life has got too busy that don't think will get time to celebarte Diwali along with all brothers and sister.
However for me it was happy Diwali as It has been long time to celebarte Diwali at home and was first diwali in Varanasi over 6 years but no firecrackers this time even have been at Home in Diwali was great. I was with parents while Laxhmi Pooja and really I delighted to light the candles .

The Source of our Problems!!!

A group of working adults got together to visit their University lecturer. The lecturer was happy to see them. Conversation soon turned into complaints about stress in work and life.The Lecturer just smiled and went to the kitchen to get an assortment of cups - some porcelain, some in plastic, some in glass, some plain looking and some looked rather expensive and exquisite.The Lecturer offered his former students the cups to get drinks for themselves.When all the students had a cup in hand with water, the Lecturer spoke: "If you noticed, all the nice looking, expensive cups were taken up, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is normal that you only want the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress. What all you wanted was water, not the cup, but we unconsciously went for the better cups.""Just like in life, if Life is Water, then the jobs, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold/maintain Life, but the quality of Life doesn't change.""If we only concentrate on the cup, we won't have time to enjoy, taste and appreciate the water in it."

Bangal-Ka-Jadu by PC sorcar Jr.

I heard lot about Bangal-Ka- Jadu (MAGIC) but never seen.
Yes, I saw lot of MAGIC which used to be at my home town
in circus or exhibition and also sometime in school days
and I used to be very happy while looking that.
Now, so many years have been passed and never thought again I will go to see Jadu as
lot of thinking changes now grown up and don't believe in Magic.
On Saturday, 07 October 2006,I went to watch Magic show by PC Sorcar Jr.
One of friend whose wife got the 3 tickets but we were 5. He asked me also to come along but I was thinking Magic...ohh. What to go for Magic. Finally I went and luckily we all five were also got entry.
Bangal-Ka-Jadu show was 2 hrs also there was 10 mins. Interval like movie show.
There were lot of items in the show and some items were amazing.
some items were also presented by Maneka Sorcar ( PC Sorcar Jr.’s dauther )
and that was also good but while watching the show I was thinking really it's great to
maintain the tradition of Magic and also the inherited art has borne most fruit, spanning the entire world, and giving fresh life to a once neglected art which coming generation will also get to know as now hardly we can find any school where Magic show would be for entertainment for children.

Don't know where life goes and how and when it turns...

Went from Varanasi to Hyderbad by Varanasi-Secundrabad Express on 11th July 2000 to pursue MCA course from University of Hyderabad ,while travelling my seat was not confirmed..quite and horrible journey.
Now I am in Kolkata. 2 hour journey from Hyderbad-Kolkata on 7th July 2006,was great and why not as flying in Kinghfisher airlines. As, I landed huh...it was raining and went to Capgemeini Guest House while going from Airport to Guest house I was just looking how is Kolkata huh..after being in Hyderbad about 6 years, was totally depressed which place I came and why not everybody would be as Hyderbad is well planned,clean and green city.

Now time goes like that and on 11th Aug 2006 was going to Home town.I was at Howrah Station and was on Platform no 9 to catch Kalaka mail I recalled everything as 6 years before in 2000 I came to Kolkata to wrote Jadavpur University entarnce test for MCA while going at that time I caught Kalaka mail at same platform.
At that time I never ever imagined that have to come again to Kolkata and for job.

Don't worry about the future

Kurt Vonnegut's commencement address at M

Ladies and gentlemen of the class of '97:
Wear sunscreen. If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis morereliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense thisadvice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You willnot understand the power and beauty of your but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum.

The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 pm on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you.

Sing.

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch.

Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't.
Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You'll miss them when they're gone.

Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's.

Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.

Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room.

Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.

Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. They're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.

Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will philander. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble, and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out.

Don't mess too much with your hair or by the time you're 40 it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen........

Masters of Body Language

When Negotiating, Look For Nonverbal Cues:

Your mother probably taught you that it's rude to stare. But when you negotiate a business deal, close observation of your opponent makes sense.By inspecting your opponent's every physical move, you can often determine whether he or she is holding something back or not telling the truth.The key is not to stare so much that you make your opponent uncomfortable, but to be aware of his or her movements through casual glances and friendly eye contact.It will almost certainly give you an edge. What should you look for? Experts who study body language suggest a two-step process. First, identify a subject's mannerisms during the initial, friendly stages of a discussion. As the negotiation unfolds, see whether your opponent suddenly adopts different behavior. "You have to watch people a long time to establish what their baseline mode is," said David Hayano, author of "Poker Faces." "Once you know how they normally behave, you may be able to tell when they start to put on an act." Hayano is a retired professor of anthropology at California State University at Northridge, who has analyzed the body language of poker players, and he's found that the rapport-building stage is a valuable time to study your opponent. Why? Because that's when you get to know someone's "natural" behavior. "If you are dealing with a very talkative executive who all of a sudden gets meek during the heat of the negotiation, then something strange is going on," he said. It may be a clue that your opponent is hiding something; other clues are exaggerated movements or excessive enthusiasm. Hayano says that in poker, for example, a player who throws chips forcefully on the table or suddenly behaves in a brash, aggressive way may be masking his being stuck with a weak hand of cards. The same goes for executives who loudly and repeatedly proclaim that they're making a major concession, when in fact they're not giving up much. "When you're negotiating with someone who starts overtalking and backslapping, this can mean they really have little to offer,".

The Seven Signals for Success
So far we have focused primarily on the pitfalls to avoid; but what messages should be sent, and how? Here are seven general suggestions on good body language for the interview.
1. Walk slowly,deliberately, and tall upon entering the room.
2. On greeting the interviewer, give (and, hopefully, receive) a friendly "eyebrow flash": that brief,slight raising of the brows that calls attention to the face, encourages eye contact, and (when accompanied by a natural smile) sends the strong positive signal that the interview has gotten off to a good start.
3. Use mirroring techniques. In other words, make an effort -- subtly! -- to reproduce the positive signals your interviewer sends. (Of course, you should never mirror negative body signals.) Say the interviewer leans forward to make a point; a few moments later, you lean forward slightly in order to hear better. Say the interviewer leans back and laughs; you "laugh beneath" the interviewer's laughter, taking care not to overwhelm your partner by using an inappropriate volume level. This technique may seem contrived at first, but you will learn that it is far from that, if only you experiment a little.
4. Maintain a naturally alert head position; keep your head up and your eyes front at all times.
5. Remember to avert your gaze from time to time so as to avoid the impression that you are staring; when you do so, look confidently and calmly to the right or left; never look down.
6. Do not hurry any movement. 7. Relax with every breath